Thursday, October 9, 2014

Mama Musings 1

Hey everyone!
Well it's been 3 weeks and about 2 hours since we welcomed our sweet little boy into the world. And everything feels different.

It's insane to me that 1) in one instant my whole world could change 2) that I could hold this tiny person in my arms and feel as if I've known him forever and 3) that I could love someone so much that sometimes it's completely overwhelming. I look at his little face and see my nose and Parker's ears. We literally made a human. Isn't that mind boggling? I know that we as a human race have been making more humans ever since we've existed so it shouldn't be that surprising and neat... but my brain can't really seem to get over it. 

Our little guy has been SO fun... and SO exhausting haha. He still loves listening to Louis Armstrong and the Beatles. Instead of cooing, as you would expect a baby to do, he growls and squeaks like the little (adorable) monster that he is. 

He loves flailing his little arms and legs around like he's treading water. His little hairs are turning red and his eyes seem to be getting more blue. 

I mean he's seriously adorable and yes he cries (and by that I mean screams) during the night and I often feel like a milk cow that needs a break but I love him so much. I get it now. I get why my mom does some of the things that she does. I get why my grandmothers did and do the things that they do. To be responsible for this tiny little person's life is an incredible responsibility. I think about him all the time. I worry about him all the time. 

I wonder what kind of man he's going to be. I wonder if he is going to be creative. Will he like seafood? Is he going to be an adrenaline junkie like his dad? Everyday I feel like I am discovering something new about him and myself and I can't wait to watch him grow... and a small part of me wants him to stay teensy and perfect and safe in my arms forever. It's conflicting and slightly confusing but I'm figuring it out. 
Oh before I go, here is the song that without fail makes my little guy smile or fall asleep. I can always count on John, Paul, George and Ringo.

So those are my thoughts for today. I hope all is well! Nursery pictures coming soon! I've just got a few projects to finish. 

Much love!
Sydney L